I’m done with Josh Duggar.
But I’m not done with talking about how abusers affect their victims.
They are liars. They lie about the fact that they molest children, hit children, yell and scream and threaten children. They lie about hitting women, raping women, threatening women, isolating women. They lie about hitting men, raping men, threatening men, isolating men. They lie to their victims about how the abuse is not abuse, that it is okay, that it is their fault, that if they tell something very bad will happen. They lie to the victim’s family and friends about how they are really a good person, about how safe the victim is with them, about how the victim started it, about what they are doing isn’t wrong because other people do the same thing, about how the victim brought it on themselves, about how they doing this because they love the victim and that it is in their best interest.
They are thieves. They steal the victim’s innocence, stability, security, mental health, safety, trust, judgement, physical health, sexual health, self worth, dignity. They steal their voice. And they throw their stolen goods away.
They are cheaters. Many cheat the criminal justice system out of justice by never facing arrest, trial, conviction, and prison. They all cheat their victims out of a life free of abuse. They cheat their victims of healing and closure when they do not face the criminal justice system. They cheat their victims out of telling their story and being believed by the lies they have spread and their appearance of being a “good” person who could not possibly done the things they did.
So abusers are liars, thieves, and cheaters. They are abusers.