Archive for July, 2015

Pre-job Anxiety

I have spent the last week dealing with a constant level of anxiety.  I was first worried that the background check would fail or the training date would be pushed back.  Then it was the details of when, where, and what to wear.  I got that info yesterday and today.  But still freaking out.

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The info from the company I’ll be working at was definitely anxiety inducing.  The dress code info was pretty straight forward but the stuff about tardiness and absences was off putting.  It read to me as if one tardy/absence and that’s it.  Well, three and you’re fired.  I understand about being on time and what not.  But I remember dealing with those certain assholes at evil security company who wanted me to be early so they could force themselves into my pants.  Yes, that’s sexual harassment but it didn’t matter.  Just be early; your personal safety isn’t important.  Or expecting you twenty minutes early to do shift change THAT I DON’T GET PAID FOR.  I’m not spending nearly an hour of my personal time at work when I’m not getting paid.  That’s theft.

I guess I’m worried that this job will be just like evil security company.  I know it isn’t because this is customer service, not security, but with how bad it got and the long time between being fired there and being hired here, I’m still waiting for the ax to drop.  Plus, I never really got closure to all the garbage they put me through.  Some of that same garbage is still going on and even encouraged so they get away with murder and I got burned.

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Though I’m still grateful I no longer have to work there or deal with those idiots and assholes.

But still freaking out.  I can keep reminding myself that is a new job, that the wording is lawyerese, that this is nothing like evil security company, that I’m just stressed from not having a job for over two years and everyone treating me like a failure because of it, that they chose to hire me to do this job, I’m still going to anxious.  But I can handle it. The weather hasn’t helped either. 

It doesn’t help that I found out yesterday that my other grandmother died.  Or that I was raised with impossible standards and expectations.  I was set up to fail and still fear failure because failure has always been an opportunity for people to hurt me.  I fail, I get hurt, badly.  Failure was and is never an option.  I must succeed and exceed so much beyond success to be considered successful. Otherwise, I’m always a failure.  Which is what everyone wants me to me.

I’ve honestly considered,  heavily considered, quitting the job, even before I start.  I know that’s messed up but that’s how I feel.  But then I would be without a job and then my parents would hate me even more.   So I’ll still work the job, for now.  But I’m that stressed out, anxious about it.

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(I like the fact that Autofill suggests assholes and spells it correctly.  Maybe it just knows and understands that sometimes assholes is the best word.)

I Didn’t Want To Jinx It…

But I got a job!!!!

I don’t start training until next month but still, A Job.

For the Trolls

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Troll trolling the Web.

If you do this, I do this.

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I follow this sign to the letter.

The only trolls allowed:

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Married? Prom? Stole these clothes? The troll we had went au natural.

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Look. Matching outfits. New this season.

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We just want a hug. And you can braid our hair and paint our nails and we'll tell stories....(Oh boy, hyper troll.)

Trolling for Kids

Apparently, pointing out how “gay marriage” can potentially hurt children makes me a bigot.  Because name calling *so proves* the same sex parents are “better” at being parents than opposite sex parents.  Sorry, no it doesn’t.

Science has proven time and again that children thrive much better in a home where their mother and father are married to each other.  There is currently no evidence that supports same sex parents being the same as opposite sex parents.  The studies that have been done are too few, too small, and the sampling too self selective. 

I do not hate gays or any one suffering from same sex attraction. I’ve had friends who were gay. They have a heavy burden to bear.  But they have been deceived and lied to about living the homosexual lifestyle and it’s effects on themselves and others.  Children should not be brought into this mess. 

So what if their same sex parents love the children?  Parenting and being good parents is more than just “love”.  But too many people, of all stripes, think love will fix anything and everything.  No, it won’t. Children are abused all the time because their parents “love” them but they are still being abused.  Love is an excuse here and hurts everyone.

Homosexuals need help, not hate. 

They, themselves, are not the issue.  Their sexual acts, their attempt to redefine marriage, and their agitation for “rights” are the problems.  Homosexual people are made in the image and likeness of God.  Same sex attraction is an effect of sin that entered the world at The Fall when Adam disobeyed God and ate of the tree of knowledge. Same sex orientation is a deviance.  It has no evolutionary benefit though the people who suffer from it are not, in any way, at fault from suffering from same sex attraction.

So, my pointing out the problems of “gay marriage” and adding children into the mix does not make me a bigot,  a hater, or a homophobe.  It makes me concerned about all involved.  As someone who has been abused, I choose to speak out against abuse and potential abuse.  I choose to speak for children who cannot or are prevented from speaking for themselves.  I choose to a voice for the voiceless and those who have their voices silenced.  I also stand up for the teachings of the Catholic Church on family and marriage  because they are the best teachings and protect men, women, and children from abuse and violence.

And since I forgot this in my previous post, children born from artificial means are still children worthy of love, protection, dignity, and respect.  Their parents’ decision are not theirs and do not reflect on the personhood of the child.  Children born from these means should not be considered wrong or bad.  They are just children.  Their parents’ decision to use artificial means of procreation is wrong but the children are never wrong.

*insert sarcasm*

Why Diets Make You Fatter — And What to Do About It | Alternet

While this article is a few years old, it still has good info.

http://www.alternet.org/story/149702/why_diets_make_you_fatter_–_and_what_to_do_about_it

(I go hunting for anti-diet info whenever I think about dieting.  I know it doesn’t work but I still struggle with how I see myself and my body.  And the constant bombardment of diets and weight loss products doesn’t help. So I look and find the evidence that supports me NOT going on a diet.)

Yes, The Children

Yesterday’s post garnered quite a lot of attention.  And it brought out the comment trolls.  Policy is still enforced.

There was a point that I didn’t make yesterday and applies not just to gays and children but society’s view of children in general. 

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Children have become a possession instead of the people they actually are.  Children are treated as things to collect.  Like dolls you can dress up, feed, play with them but if they don’t meet adults impossible standards or the adults grow tired of them the children are abused, thrown away, rehomed,  or even killed.  I thought the increase in child abuse reports had to do with better reporting and tracking.  Yes and no.  There is better reporting but also, more parents are hurting their children. 

There has been a shift in how society sees children.  On one level, they have become people worthy of rights and protection.  Overall, though, children are much more likely to be seen and considered possessions, toys, objects to show off to others.  They don’t exist as people with needs and wants of their own. 

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So children become pawns, objects in a game.  Especially when the adult considers their rights more important than anybody else’s.  “Gay marriage” places gays’ sexual orientation and acts above the protection of children.  Homosexuals who “marry” and then “have”  children are using those children to play at marriage and family.  Their “gay marriage” and “family” is entirely artificial.  It comes from forcing mismatched pieces together to make something they were not meant to make or go together.

And while it can happen in heterosexual marriages, children are a natural part and result of the marriage.  Yes, the couple may use artificial means to have children (IVF, surrogacy, sperm donors, etc.) but these methods are still wrong and force a children conceived by one of these means to be a possession.  They “create” a child in the lab instead of through the natural means of sexual intercourse.  And most of those artificial methods have a high failure rate and are expensive.

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Heterosexual marriage is the best family for children.  They get a mother and father who create them in love and raise them in a stable environment that is protective and nurturing.  The children are people in this family rather than objects of possession. 

Yes, abuse is possible but it is much, much less likely to happen than in any other “family” makeup.  The instant a child loses a parent instability and insecurity sets in.  No matter if the child gains another parent through a parent’s new marriage or the parent stays single or the parent chooses to be in a homosexual relationship, the child loses.  Even if the child has been removed from an abusive home, the child knows that it needs and wants a mother and a father.  Artificial means of procreation tells the child that the adult’s desires are more important than the child’s needs and that the child is like an object bought at the store instead of the child lovingly created through an act of love and unity.

Children know.  They are people, too, and that is a fact that we ignore, deny, and cover up to our own and their peril.  Children, once they figure out that they are supposed to have a mother and father, feel lost and ashamed for not having what they expect.  They feel that it is their fault that they do not have whichever parent is missing from their lives and so determine that they are unimportant and worthless as people.  If they feel they are there just to serve the adults’ selfish needs and wants, they are being abused and their rights to care, love and protection violated.

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I think hearing from two gay men on how they view all this is important.  When they stand up for the family, it’s a big deal.

In an interview with the Italian magazine Panorama, designers Domenico Dolce and Stefano Gabbana of Dolce & Gabbana had some contentious things to say about same-sex families.

According to translations, the pair — who dated for 23 years and broke up in 2005 — stated that children born through IVF are “children of chemistry, synthetic children. Uteruses for rent, semen chosen from a catalog.”

“I am gay, I cannot have a child. I guess you cannot have everything in life,” Dolce added. “Life has a natural course, some things cannot be changed. One is the family.”

What About The Children?

“Gay marriage ” does not protect children.  It abuses them.  “Gay marriage” provides a “legally” promoted structure that hurts children in every way.  In “gay marriage”, children are property and objects to be taken from their parents and raised in an environment that is oriented towards the adults selfish sexual gratification.  Children lose their God given humanity and right to be raised and loved by a mother and a father who are married to each other when they are raised by “gay parents” in a “gay marriage”. 

Marriage, properly understood, has as its end, the holiness of the spouses and the creation and raising of children.

“Gay marriage” can do neither.  Two lesbians cannot conceive a child through their sexual acts nor can to gay men.  They must take children from their true parents or force a woman to give up her natural child so that the child is forced into a most unnatural environment. That child is deprived of its natural parents and forced to have parents who selected it as if they had gone down to Ikea and picked out a new sofa.  Even children whose families started out normal with mom and dad are forced into accepting a parent’s unnatural living arrangements when one parent chooses to divorce and live in a gay relationship.

So “gay marriage” does not benefit children in any way.  Governments and religions have always understood that marriage is about children and the protection of the family and the future of civilization.  “Gay marriage” destroys all three because it is a selfish adult act that is only oriented towards the adults.

You say, what about children adopted by gays who never would have been adopted otherwise?   Honestly, those children would still have been adopted by a loving couple with a husband and wife who would love them as children and raise them into adulthood.  They would learn how to be men and women from their father AND mother. 

Gay parents are absent a parent.  Children in that situation have only one “parent” a mother or a father.  Having two mothers ot two fathers is much like being raised by a single parent and not good for the child.  A child suffers with only one parent and studies have proven that being raised by a single parent has a detrimental effect on the child’s education, physical, emotional, and psychological health.  Children do much better in a family with both a mother and a father, which science has proven time and again.

As for the studies that “prove” gay parents are on the same level as opposite sex parents, those studies have very poor methodology, very limited sampling, and the studies themselves were improperly designed with the deliberate aim that they would “prove” gay parents were on par or better than opposite sex parents. 

So the science supports opposite sex parenting as being extremely beneficial for children while same sex parenting has no scientific support and preliminary research shows that same sex parenting is the same as single parenting or worse.


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