It has not been a good week for me. The only decent day was Thursday and even then I didn’t go to Adoration like I was supposed to.
I don’t feel like crap or anything but sleeping and hiding in bed is about the only thing I want to do. So of course today I slept from about 1am this morning till after 6pm this evening. I meant to get up at 8:30 am when my alarm went off but stayed in bed. Woke up just after 2 pm, checked stuff on my phone, and then went back to sleep. Which is when the bad headspace showed up. I won’t get into what was there but suffice it to say I will most definitely be going to Confession tomorrow.
I know my depression lingers due to my continued unemployment and that I rarely leave my apartment except to go to the library, the grocery store, and church. I pretty much don’t have a life. I just feel like I shouldn’t be falling into bad headspace even with the depression. I’ve been praying though maybe missing Adoration yesterday caused the bad headspace to happen today. I don’t know. I feel like I should be stronger, that I can control because I know better than to allow bad headspace anywhere near me but it still happens. I keep screwing up.
I don’t know. Bad headspace.