Loyalty to Pain

The title comes from the lyrics to Charlotte Martin’s song Veins. It feels like everything is just getting worse, that everything is going to come to a head and I will lose everything. It’s going to be bad. So a bit of a backtrack. I made it to Mass Sunday and sorely wished I hadn’t. … Continue reading Loyalty to Pain

Being Redeemed

Charlotte Martin “Redeemed” This song has been a big help lately. It’s not a religious song but you could interpret some of the lyrics as religious in meaning. I really appreciate the chorus because it says the abuse and my depression aren’t all of me. “Where is the hand for me to reach, where is … Continue reading Being Redeemed

New Meds Again

Sorry I’ve been away.  I just have no interest in things.  And no energy The Welbutrin didn’t help or hurt so the doc put me on Lexapro.  Two big side effects : increased anxiety and screwed up sleep.  Not fun.  I told the doc if this one didn’t work then I want to be off … Continue reading New Meds Again

Depression Reset

The Effexor had lots of nasty side effects.  I’m now on Welbutrin.  We’ll see how that goes.  This has been the longest episode of my depression yet. I’m barely functional most days and currently in tears daily though I think that’s from Effexor withdrawl. I feel cut off from my Catholic faith and it doesn’t … Continue reading Depression Reset